And She Said

– Jaffa, 11.2017


And she said:
Don’t you ever contact me again
Don’t pretend
That we’re friends
No amends, this is the end
I contend you’re number one
In my top ten
Set of regrets
An experience I’d much rather forget
I couldn’t give you one percent
There is nothing in me left
You have spent every cent
Of this love that I have lent
I lament the extent
of the ends I underwent
when my intent
was intensely bent on making you content

Evidently if there’s any empathy within you yet
I would strenuously stress
Please persist to let me rest
And resist to express
Everything that’s in your chest
Get some common sense
You’re so damn dense, you’re making me incensed
Matter fact, I think it’s best
That you see a therapist

And she said:
Go get yourself in therapy
You’re scaring me
In all sincerity
You’ll never be the man to marry me
I guarantee
We’ll never ever, ever be a pair, you see
Apparently you’re too impaired
To see this with some clarity
You’re overbearingly preparing me
To act despairingly
You say you truly care for me
But can’t see this calamity
Has squarely pared away my barely there remaining amity

And she said:
Go collect your things and please leave
I won’t grieve, I believe I am moving on with ease

And she said:
You could never be the father of my kids
I can’t be bothered with your fits
You are volatile as shit
You’ve got too many problems
No way you can resolve them
You were too self-involved when
I needed your consoling
You are so self-centered
So cynical in your essence
I’m repressed by your presence
Your immature adolescence

My recommendation
Go get some medication
Some education on how to have healthy relation-
Ships, I see you slip
And then you tip into insanity
My vanity can barely let me suffer such profanity
Off-handedly you handed over all of your humanity
Demanded I disband my plans and withstand all your enmity
Now you extend your hand to me and beg me for some amnesty
But can’t you see, my answer is you turned me into an amputee

And she said:
You are not the person who I thought
You are distraught, overwrought
fraught by an onslaught
Of issues, that you accrued
That you eschew
To breakthrough
It’s true
I wish I never knew
The person who you grew into

And she said:
Your anger is an angst
That makes me anxiously
Feel like I’m endangered
by a stranger who might strangle me
And maybe I’m no angel
But I’m unable and strained to see
the angle where you wouldn’t be inflicting something painfully

And she said:
I need someone emotionally even
Not anti-social in approach or gauche
So I am leaving
You are so condescending
So often reprehending me
And you pretend to comprehend
Just how you are offending me

Telling me how I should feel
Yelling at me till I reel
This ordeal has revealed who you are
And now I need to heal

I never feel like you are seeing me
Secretly so greedily
Ignoring what I’m needing
It feels more like you are bleeding me
so I am pleading
Let me breathe, it bears repeating
You’ve completely depleted my love
You’re so conceited
I’m retreating from the browbeating
Deleting all the memories
The way you treated me was so demeaning, with no empathy

And she said:
I can’t manage your mood swings
I’ve been barely hanging on this by the shoestrings
The damage that these feuds bring
With you being unglued
In your turpitude seething
Barely leaves me breathing

And she said:
You are too high maintenance
You’ve tried all of my patience
So now yeah it makes sense
To burn this like some frankincense
And take it to place from whence
We break it from the present tense

And she said:
The way you struggle with your sleep
Is insufferable at least
And uncomfortable to keep
On repeating, nah
I’m demanding that this cease
I’m demanding a release
Can’t you  please leave me in peace

And she said:
In the mornings you’re a nightmare
Never fighting fair and ignoring how I might care
forswearing all my welfare
Scorning all I dare declare
I was left so ill-prepared
I swear that we’re in disrepair

There’s no trust that can be restored
No lust that could be re-forged
No us that can be reformed
No hitting re-record
No encore
Therefore I must walk out this door

You are someone I almost abhor
For sure not someone I adore
Maybe before
Now I deplore you at your core
Let me absolutely underscore
I just don’t love you anymore

And I said:
Lord please!
I concede I seem diseased
But I’ll get on my knees
And plead
Yeah, I know it sounds deranged
But I maintain that I can change
And rearrange all this behavior that seems deeply ingrained
If you give me one more chance
To enhance the expanse of our romance
I swear that I will alter every circumstance
And never falter